So I'm writing a blog. Happy now Dyl?
So I've found this absolutely beautiful cover of Moondance by Van Morrison on piano that was in August Rush that I really want to do for my assessment. For my Jazz piece I think. If not I want to have a look in the book that Bridget had today in Music and have a flick through for a song. I dunno, I'll work out what I'm gunna do for them eventually. Probably night before like always.
I made dinner last night. Chicken in Honey. Only problem was that I super cooked the chicken and I couldn't eat it all. 'Twas nice though.
I would also like to let a particular person know a little something(you know who you are). Don't say that nobody loves you. I do. I love you and you should always keep it in your mind.
Haha, there's money rolling around in the bottom of the dryer. I can here it. :) I know where that's going straight to.
So next month we have to move out of this house that we've been in for what will be 5 and a half years. I'm gunna miss it, and at the moment, I don't know where I'll be at the end of April. Scary thought actually. There's this house that we went and had a look at first thing this morning in Rosedale. It is gorgeous. It's little and blue, has four bedrooms, and is about 200, if that, metres away from the beach. I really reallly hope we get that, and I will deffo cry if we don't.
So I don't really know what else to write at the moment. I had a good day. Mrs Lyttle doesn't fill the Milo's up in the morning very well. The best toasted cheese sandwiches come from Nards, Enfield and Richards. And Campbell didn't do too bad this morning either.
Um, what else. Today was fun. I scared Brady. I sat on his knee. CAFs was full of laughing again today. I got Vegemite on my shirt. Thanks Kayla. Apparently my noodles today smelt like Cat pee. I didn't think they did. Brady bought me lunch. :) Thanks Brady. Alex didn't do "WATAHED!!!" in Maths again.
Eh, I spose that'll do, I'll write another one if I remember other stuffs.
Much love,
Me. x
p.s. i really do love you. :)
Friday, March 12, 2010
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
some people can surprise you, if you give them the chance.
I can't help anymore. I've talked people out of unspeakable things. But when I was asked to do it again, I physically couldn't bring myself to do it again. It hurts too much.
The past couple of days has seen so many tears shed. Today seemed to drag on. Time taking its toll on everyone. Six words, that seemed to shatter my world today. "I love you. Never forget that." They killed me inside. I wanted to fall onto the ground and scream like a two year old. But I couldn't. I was in an office and am sixteen, not two.
As hard as the days have been lately, something inside me is saying cherish them. They're numbered. And as much as I try to be happy and hold it together in front of people, I can't. I manage most of the time, but lately it's just been way too hard.
I was handed a letter today that confused me to start with, but after talking about it with a good old friend of mine, we discovered that there has to be some sort of underlying meaning behind it.
Time just seems to be a way for the Universe to say "Get this up ya!" And it works. It rips and tears and I feel worse and worse everyday. What am I supposed to do if they disappear? What will I become if she leaves? How am I going to react to questions being asked? What will my friends think of me?
What do my friends think of me now? The one question that always seems to be floating in my mind all the time. Do they really love me? Or is that just some ploy to make me happy? Do my friends want me around? Or are they just being nice? I'm not totally sure of this, but that's what I've gotten out of the past few days. And with all the crap I've been through, I'm not totally trusting with friends. Sure I can talk to them, but can I tell them absolutely everything? Can I trust them to be around when I need them the most.
I have this one friend. They seem to always be able to make me smile, no matter how shit I'm feeling. And while I've been comforting them, I found them today comforting me. This was so strange. I'm usually the one lending the shoulder to cry on. Very rarely do I need this in return. And a shoulder lent from a person I rarely speak to. Even the smallest things these days are setting me off.
I have this teddy that I bought myself for Valentines Day, and lately, it's been a symbol of my friends. Each day it's someone new. Each day I kiss it on the head and thank God that I have the most amazing people in my life.
Some people don't realise how much a hug can say. And I know they can be awkward, but when people need them, they need them. As a sign of affection and friendship.
Anywho, I think I've depressed enough.
Love, love,
Me. xx
"p.s. i love you x "
The past couple of days has seen so many tears shed. Today seemed to drag on. Time taking its toll on everyone. Six words, that seemed to shatter my world today. "I love you. Never forget that." They killed me inside. I wanted to fall onto the ground and scream like a two year old. But I couldn't. I was in an office and am sixteen, not two.
As hard as the days have been lately, something inside me is saying cherish them. They're numbered. And as much as I try to be happy and hold it together in front of people, I can't. I manage most of the time, but lately it's just been way too hard.
I was handed a letter today that confused me to start with, but after talking about it with a good old friend of mine, we discovered that there has to be some sort of underlying meaning behind it.
Time just seems to be a way for the Universe to say "Get this up ya!" And it works. It rips and tears and I feel worse and worse everyday. What am I supposed to do if they disappear? What will I become if she leaves? How am I going to react to questions being asked? What will my friends think of me?
What do my friends think of me now? The one question that always seems to be floating in my mind all the time. Do they really love me? Or is that just some ploy to make me happy? Do my friends want me around? Or are they just being nice? I'm not totally sure of this, but that's what I've gotten out of the past few days. And with all the crap I've been through, I'm not totally trusting with friends. Sure I can talk to them, but can I tell them absolutely everything? Can I trust them to be around when I need them the most.
I have this one friend. They seem to always be able to make me smile, no matter how shit I'm feeling. And while I've been comforting them, I found them today comforting me. This was so strange. I'm usually the one lending the shoulder to cry on. Very rarely do I need this in return. And a shoulder lent from a person I rarely speak to. Even the smallest things these days are setting me off.
I have this teddy that I bought myself for Valentines Day, and lately, it's been a symbol of my friends. Each day it's someone new. Each day I kiss it on the head and thank God that I have the most amazing people in my life.
Some people don't realise how much a hug can say. And I know they can be awkward, but when people need them, they need them. As a sign of affection and friendship.
Anywho, I think I've depressed enough.
Love, love,
Me. xx
"p.s. i love you x "
Sunday, March 7, 2010
worse shit in the world has happened.
I think I should be doing my Religion assignment. But honestly, I couldn't be fucked. So I'm gunna blog about our Biology "Excursion".
I woke up this morning confused as to whether or not the excursion would be on or not, so after texting a couple of people, I wore my school uniform to school, only to change straight into my mufti clothes as sson as I arrived at school. When we reached our destination, it was the 34567898765345km trek to the actual tidal zone that near killed me. And then we had to dawdle 100m out towards the Ocean. We barely made the hundred metres from where we started to the waters edge. Anywho, from there we did what we had to, until it started raining and then we left and went back to school. I love a good old trek over the treterous terrain of the beach carrying a 4537645kg box that threatened to snap my arms out of its sockets.
Stupid car battery died, so now Mum has her Dad over here trying to jump start the freaking thing. Mind you I did help. I popped both bonnets and reversed the car out of the garage with Mum pushing. Made me feel good.
When we got back to school, we had 20mins of PC that consisted of a lecture from Mrs Lyttle and then to lunch we heigh-hoed. After lunch we had a bloody double Biology. Far out. Anyway, we all sat through the next two hours of Biology and in the last 10mins, even Mr Hynes gave up. Everyone was completely drained and ready for a siesta.
I would like to let everyone know, I know I have boobs, and that I blish alot. BUT. Something stopped the blushing a while ago, and I managed to keep it under control, but as of late, I think it's coming back. God damn those boys.
LOVE can criple, thrill and frustrate.
HATE can drive some to insanity.
I'd prefer a bunch of flower as a gift than an actual present anyday.
A dozen red roses can say I love you.
But a single red rose says that my heart is yours.
A teddy says you are my friend.
But time tells the tale.
The line between friendship and a relationship can destroy or transform.
But the line between love and hate hurts.
We have to believe that to love someone will bring us all the happiness in the world,
And believing in hating someone can bring you crumbling down in self pitty.
Hahahahahaha. Mum just worked out why the car wouldn't start. She forgot to put her foot on the clutch to start it. Idiot.
My motto at the moment: Worse shit in the world has happened.
Much love.
Me xx
I woke up this morning confused as to whether or not the excursion would be on or not, so after texting a couple of people, I wore my school uniform to school, only to change straight into my mufti clothes as sson as I arrived at school. When we reached our destination, it was the 34567898765345km trek to the actual tidal zone that near killed me. And then we had to dawdle 100m out towards the Ocean. We barely made the hundred metres from where we started to the waters edge. Anywho, from there we did what we had to, until it started raining and then we left and went back to school. I love a good old trek over the treterous terrain of the beach carrying a 4537645kg box that threatened to snap my arms out of its sockets.
Stupid car battery died, so now Mum has her Dad over here trying to jump start the freaking thing. Mind you I did help. I popped both bonnets and reversed the car out of the garage with Mum pushing. Made me feel good.
When we got back to school, we had 20mins of PC that consisted of a lecture from Mrs Lyttle and then to lunch we heigh-hoed. After lunch we had a bloody double Biology. Far out. Anyway, we all sat through the next two hours of Biology and in the last 10mins, even Mr Hynes gave up. Everyone was completely drained and ready for a siesta.
I would like to let everyone know, I know I have boobs, and that I blish alot. BUT. Something stopped the blushing a while ago, and I managed to keep it under control, but as of late, I think it's coming back. God damn those boys.
LOVE can criple, thrill and frustrate.
HATE can drive some to insanity.
I'd prefer a bunch of flower as a gift than an actual present anyday.
A dozen red roses can say I love you.
But a single red rose says that my heart is yours.
A teddy says you are my friend.
But time tells the tale.
The line between friendship and a relationship can destroy or transform.
But the line between love and hate hurts.
We have to believe that to love someone will bring us all the happiness in the world,
And believing in hating someone can bring you crumbling down in self pitty.
Hahahahahaha. Mum just worked out why the car wouldn't start. She forgot to put her foot on the clutch to start it. Idiot.
My motto at the moment: Worse shit in the world has happened.
Much love.
Me xx
Friday, March 5, 2010
some people just make me want to..GRRRRRRR
This isn't direted at anyone in particular, but people who think that people need to come across happier in their blogs need to stop. Seriously, someones' blog is probably their way of getting things off their chest that they can't say to anyone or out loud.
Stoopid.
I hate driving. I can't do it and I nearly crashed the car. It's not that I don't like driving, it's that I can't do it and I hate the manual car. I don't care if people rekon the manual's better, I fucking hate it and I get frustrated and upset because I can't do it. I know what I have to do in pieces, but putting it all together shits me to tears. Literally.
And then I start crying about things that I don't know. And then I fall asleep. And then wake up hungry. Then I make a Vegemite sammich and put too much vegemite on. And then I feel funny.
I've also decided that I need to do something about my weight and fitness. I know people are gunna go you're a dickhead, you're not fat. But that's the beauty of clothing. You can hide just about anything. Scars, weight, pain. So yep. My only problem is I know I have to do something, but I have no motivation.
Anyway. I'm hungry. I think.
Love Me xx
Stoopid.
I hate driving. I can't do it and I nearly crashed the car. It's not that I don't like driving, it's that I can't do it and I hate the manual car. I don't care if people rekon the manual's better, I fucking hate it and I get frustrated and upset because I can't do it. I know what I have to do in pieces, but putting it all together shits me to tears. Literally.
And then I start crying about things that I don't know. And then I fall asleep. And then wake up hungry. Then I make a Vegemite sammich and put too much vegemite on. And then I feel funny.
I've also decided that I need to do something about my weight and fitness. I know people are gunna go you're a dickhead, you're not fat. But that's the beauty of clothing. You can hide just about anything. Scars, weight, pain. So yep. My only problem is I know I have to do something, but I have no motivation.
Anyway. I'm hungry. I think.
Love Me xx
beachyness
Today, so far, was spent wandering aimlessly around Broulee and Mossy Point so Kayla could get a head-start on her photography assignment for the end of the year. The day started all happy and everyone was keen as bean. Then we got there.
After a 5345678035903457206km treck following Kayla we arrived at the headland where we started taking photos. While photos of Brady and Ally were being taken I wondered over to a nice spot looking over the water. And that's where the first photo of me and Dyl was taken. Anyway the rest of the day consisted of walking around taking photos.
We wondered down to Broulee Beach and finished up with a quick swim. I got kinda depressed and angry once we were there. It was like someone was sending bad energy at me, or like someone wanted me to be upset. I don't know, it was weird. I went from being super happy and bubbly and then to cranky and wanting to kill someone. Anyway we headed to the Muffin Shop. Ally got picked up and we headed back to Kayla's place.
We finished up and now I'm writing this and about to head home.
g'bye eberybody.
Me xx
After a 5345678035903457206km treck following Kayla we arrived at the headland where we started taking photos. While photos of Brady and Ally were being taken I wondered over to a nice spot looking over the water. And that's where the first photo of me and Dyl was taken. Anyway the rest of the day consisted of walking around taking photos.
We wondered down to Broulee Beach and finished up with a quick swim. I got kinda depressed and angry once we were there. It was like someone was sending bad energy at me, or like someone wanted me to be upset. I don't know, it was weird. I went from being super happy and bubbly and then to cranky and wanting to kill someone. Anyway we headed to the Muffin Shop. Ally got picked up and we headed back to Kayla's place.
We finished up and now I'm writing this and about to head home.
g'bye eberybody.
Me xx
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